HDTV Conspiracy Hit By Economy

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We have learned shocking news that a conspiracy to brainwash millions around the globe has been delayed due to the bad economy. It seems that digital spectrum for HDTV is conveniently similar to human brainwaves, and was part of a plot to use mind control to enslave the human race.

Mind control

Since the recession hit late last year, sales of consumer electronics are slumping, which is impacting the wide-spread adoption of HDTVs. The implications of a potential drop in HDTV sales go beyond just TV retailers and manufacturers, and I am not talking about adoption of the high-definition Blu-ray disc.

You might have thought the economy would cause the prices of HDTV to drop, but that is not the case. Flat panel factories are cutting back on production, keeping prices from plunging. Some factories are closing altogether, rather like OPEC to artificially inflate the prices. In a perverse way this has done more to save us. Where people were unwittingly getting ready to take the plunge and buy a HDTV, they are now sitting on the fence, waiting to see what will happen with their jobs.

Retailers are projecting a dismal year for HDTV sales in 2009. This February was the date that the government flipped the switch, and stopped broadcasting analog TV in a hope to push more consumers into making the switch to HDTV. But so far it has not happened.

BrainwashingWhen consumers convert to high definition, their old cable provider will not work. Viewers must subscribe to a digital cable service that offers HDTV. This service is generally higher in cost than standard cable. You have to get a new HDTV cable box, which is secretly part of the brainwashing mechanism to gain your submission, your obedience and your soul.

This correspondent believes it is all a big conspiracy with governments and other agencies involved. Once the population with HDTV reached about 80%, government vans would go out to find those of us who are not yet enslaved. But fortunately the advancement has been brought to a crawl by the economy. Who would have guessed that it had such a positive consequence.