Canada Launches HST Tax During An Economic Downturn

Less than a month to go now as Canada rolls out new taxes for two of its provinces and increases the taxes on a third province. All of this is a big cash grab to help pay for the huge bailout packages given out to the banking and automobile sectors last year. The timing is very bad as it happens to be at the worst time to roll out new taxation, since the whole country is still reeling from the recession, and likely about to go down for the second time in two years. Some claim this is further evidence that the government is run by a race of lizard like aliens who do not have our best interests at heart, and who are actively causing an economic downturn for their amusement.

Many people are bailing out of Canada. The bacon, maple syrup and the cute flags are just not worth the added tax burden. Even the fact that Canada owns much of the Arctic is not that apealing, since it is melting so quickly with the global warming (another side effect of the economy). People who had previously immigrated to Canada are hurrying to return back to their country of birth, since the relative economic differential is no longer that big of an incentive to stay in Canada. Those of Canadian birth are seeking assylum in countries as far away as Latvia and Brazil.

Old people who are too old and weak to escape the country are trapped and will suffer the most. As seniors living on fixed incomes the only way to reduce their cost of living is to purchase less food since they can't reduce the cost of their utilities or taxes. With the economy bad like this, their retirement savings are all but gone on the stock markets or governement bonds. And as they can't afford the cost of a vehicle, they can no longer run over a moose and take it home for food, like they do in Alberta.

In the province of Ontario, the government has come up with a unique way to slow down the exodus of people trying to flee the oncoming taxes. All points of exit, such as train stations and airports now have a new exit visa requirement, with a lengthy application process, a substantial visa application fee and the opportunity to deny a visa where they feel it is worth too much to let the person go.

To counter this, some churches and non-profit groups have formed a form of 'underground railway' to smuggle people south across the border to the USA and then on to freedom. This is startling, since in the past there was a similar underground railway that helped to get black people North to Canada and freedom. One group tried to dig a tunnel under one of the great lakes, but that failed when the roof caved in and several people drowned. Still the movement continues. Meanwhile, the government is cracking down hard on this trend, and the Prime Minister has promised that people convicted of human smuggling will be getting harsh sentences, such as hard labor working in the maple syrup mines in Nunavut.

On the west coast in British Columbia, the story is the same. Some of the luckier wealthy people are able to bribe their way to getting an exit visa and passage aboard a plane out of the country. They are limited in how much money they can take out, with less than ten thousand dollars per person, so they end up donating the bulk of their fortunes to the United Way. "It is a huge windfall for the United Way, and the many charities we support," said a representative. "Now we can build that marble head office we always wanted."

In Nova Scotia, the HST is being increased by a further 2%, which brings it up to just 86%. This means a jug of milk, which costs about $4 in Alberta would cost about $7.50 in Nova Scotia. Many residents said they were switching from using milk to using water to make their porridge in the mornings, since there was no tax on water. Some people even collect rainwater, which is plentiful in that part of the country, and filtering the water to make it drinkable. An elderly gentleman took it a step further, by adding a suspension of chalk to make the water look more like the milk he could no longer afford. The milk marketing board and the dairy farmers they represent are in and uproar over the tax gouging, and have gone to court to try and seek some tax relief or a reduction on the tax on milk, in the hopes that people will switch back to milk.

Following the protests by the milk marketing board and the dairy farmers, the Canadian Emu Ranching Association (CERA) has pettitioned the government to consider an exemption for emu products, stating that it is a healthier alternative to beef and pork.

Across Ontario and British Columbia on July 1, there are planned 'HST parties' or rallies, similar to the 'Tea Parties' that have happened in the states. Opposition politicians and special interest groups will be attending, to complain bitterly about the new taxation and how it will push the bad economy further into an economic downturn the likes of which we may never recover from. There may be flag burning and the burning of effigies of the Prime Minister.

Meanwhile, the lizard like aliens in government plan to have extra police and riot squads on standby and at all major government offices in preparation for reprisals. The message is that if you complain, you will be hit hard with large heavy wooden sticks, and when you wake up, you may find yourself in a maple syrup mine in Nunavut. It is not a coincidence that July 1 is also Canada Day, when there will be festivities across the country to celebrate our nation's birthday. Many people are scared of the lizard like aliens, and think that it is far too convenient that the governent could just bash innocent citizens on the head and haul them off to who knows where, while claiming they were HST protestors.