TSX Caves To Pressure

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Canada's main stock market index has been under constant pressure in this bad economy, from investors to identify the good stocks from the bad ones, so that the investors would have an easier time making money. This comes after a four-week-long losing streak, which has upset many.

 Lose Your Job

Hopes had been high that the American economy would show some job growth in January, causing a knock-on effect in Canada. Instead, the U.S. Labour Department's non-farm payrolls report said the economy shed 20,000 jobs last month.

The president of the TSX came out with the new initiative to stem the falling confidence in the stock market, and to bring back investors who have turned away from equities to commodities, and worse yet those who just hide their money under mattresses.

"Starting today, we will identify good stocks in green and bad stocks in red. If you want to make money, simply buy into the green stocks, or if you want to continue on as before just keep buying the red ones," the president said at a press conference.

When asked about stocks they were unsure of, they would be colored yellow. So the result will be rather like traffic lights. The TSX plans to put out ads with slogans like "Put your money on green and your investments will go somewhere" or "Stuck at a red light? Go green"

Of course the association for colorblind and visually challenged investors are keenly awaiting something that will address their needs, such as a braille interface. Until then, they will have to rely on friends to tell them, or continue to lose money as they have done for some time.

"This is a tremendous step forward in investing," said one financial advisor, "I used to have to use a dartboard to help me pick stocks for my clients, and my aim was off recently." For a long time, advisors tried to steer clients away from stocks, which they saw as more risky than mutual funds, since they knew the mutual funds were guaranteed (to lose).

Makers of color monitors are extremely happy over this development, as they see more people using this as a reason to upgrade from black and white. Equally, many see this as a springboard to encourage companies to "go green" in order to attract investor funding. All in all, this is positive news in this bad economy.

The next thing we expect to see is the lotto tickets clearly marked to show which are the winning tickets. Good luck on that one!