Immigrants Forced Out By Bad Economy

Illegal immigrants who came to the United States in search of work and a new life, are now leaving in a tidal wave of exodus. With the economy so bad, there is no work left for hard working immigrants, so it is time to go home.

In a surprise turn about, many Amercans were stopped at the border, trying to sneak in to Mexico in search of work.  Some say it is because the can't find jobs back home. But others say it is because they fear the catastrophic effects of weather causing mass destruction and chaos, something like in the movie The Day After Tomorrow.

"We don't know, but it is going to be bad - very bad." said alarmist Walt Wozenfrinkle. He and his family were moving as far South as possible, to get as much distance from whatever may come in the North. When asked if he had seen the movie, he confirmed that he had.

If enough illegal immigrants and US citizens leave the country, it could seriously impact the chances of a speedy recovery, once the bailout begins to take effect and new jobs are created. "There will be noone left to do the jobs."

In an attempt to stop the tidal wave of illegal immigrants and US citizens from leaving the country, department of homeland security and border guards are now focused on keeping people from leaving.

"This is an unprecedented move on our part. We never thought that we would be having to detain our own citizens, and even encourage illegal immigrants to remain here." said an unnamed source.

The lack of work in the United States has had a trickle down effect in the immigrants' countries of origin. Money sent back home by Mexican immigrants in 2008 fell for the first time since record-keeping began 13 years ago

Emergency economic stimulus plans are taking too long, and not everyone has enough warm clothing for when it gets suddenly cold. If you cannot make it out in time, we suggest you make your way to the public library and burn books to survive. Be careful not to get attacked by wolves that may have escaped from a local zoo.