- Written by Duncan
Sad news, just in, the Easter Bunny has been let go. Citing budget cuts and overall coroporate downsizing plans, his employer has terminated the contract that goes back centuries. Children all around the world will be disappointed this year.
Traditionally the Easter Bunny had the job of hopping around with a basket of chocolate eggs and hiding them for little children to find. It seems this is a sign of the times that it will no longer be part of the Easter traditions.
"It had to happen sometime" said the bunny, "work has been slowing down over the last few months. My colleague Frosty the Snowman was facing similar threats of layoff earlier this year."
Surprisingly the chocolate industry is doing rather well in this bad economy. The extra demand is brought upon by the depression caused by job losses and investments going south. As the dow has plunged, the orders for candy bars has risen. So much so that there is a drain on the world's supplies of cocoa and sugar, needed for making of chocolate eggs.
Imagine if you can, millions of unemployed and out of work people, sitting at home eating chocolates. Perhaps later on this year we will see a spike in diabetes related deaths, and you might want to invest in health clubs and weight loss companies once the guilt has sunk in.
Anyways, with the reduction in chocolate egg production, the services of the Easter Bunny were no longer required. Mr Bunny opted to move to Florida and will be retiring for the foreseeable future. He said that he feels saddened and will miss his job, especially seeing the smiles in the faces of the little children.
Some children have started a letter writing campaign to reinstate the poor bunny, but they have been mailing their letters to Santa. Said a representative Elf from the North Pole "We have problems of our own to deal with, what with the reindeer being downsized, and toy manufacturing being outsourced to China. Mr Bunny is on his own this time."